What Motherhood Taught Me About Sleep

As a Norland Nanny and sleep consultant, I thought I knew everything there was to know about sleep. After all, I had worked with countless families and children around the world, supporting them through their sleep struggles and creating routines that would lead to restful nights for everyone. But then, I became a mother myself.

Motherhood, like nothing else, has a way of humbling you and reshaping your perspective. While I was always passionate about sleep and how essential it is for little ones, nothing prepared me for the profound way that becoming a mum would deepen my understanding of the challenges that come with ensuring a child gets the sleep they need—and, of course, the toll it takes on us as parents.

The Reality of Sleep Struggles:

Before becoming a mum, I had the luxury of advising parents from a place of knowledge and theory. I understood the importance of sleep routines, optimal sleep environments, and how to settle a child. But when I became a mum, everything changed. Suddenly, I wasn’t just teaching sleep methods—I was living them.

I vividly remember the early days with my daughter, Poppy. She was such a bundle of joy, but those sleepless nights? They hit me like a brick wall. As a sleep consultant, I knew exactly what I “should” be doing, but the reality of waking up every hour with a crying baby, trying to soothe her back to sleep, was completely different. Those moments when you feel like you’re losing your grip because you haven’t had more than a few hours of rest—those are the times that truly challenged my perception of sleep.

It’s one thing to give advice, and another to live it. But it was these very moments that taught me the most.

Sleep is Personal:

One of the most important lessons motherhood has taught me about sleep is that it’s deeply personal. What works for one family doesn’t always work for another, and the strategies that work on paper don’t always translate perfectly into real-life situations. When I was sleep-training Poppy, I had to adapt and be flexible, something that I never fully appreciated before.

As a professional, I used to focus a lot on perfect routines and methods that were “guaranteed to work.” But as a mum, I learned that there’s no “one size fits all.” Some nights, I’d have to go back to basics, rocking her in my arms, reminding myself that some phases are just temporary, and that’s okay.

Sleep, I’ve learned, isn’t a rigid rulebook. It’s a journey. The more I accepted that not every night would be perfect, the easier it became to give myself grace as a mother and a sleep consultant. It’s about flexibility, understanding, and kindness to both your child and yourself.

Understanding Parent Guilt:

I’ll admit, there were times I struggled with guilt. As a sleep consultant, I was supposed to have it all figured out, right? But the truth is, sleep struggles can leave you feeling defeated—no matter how much you know about it. I found myself thinking, “Why isn’t this working? Why can’t I get this right?” And then I realised: this is the human side of sleep. All parents experience it at some point. Sleep is not about perfection; it’s about being there for your child and showing up every day with love and patience.

That’s something I now share with the families I support. It’s not just about following a perfect plan—it’s about being kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned and remembering that you are doing your best. After all, no one knows your child the way you do.

Empathy for Tired Parents:

As a sleep consultant, I’ve always had empathy for tired parents, but motherhood opened my eyes even more to the depths of exhaustion that many parents face. Sleep deprivation is brutal. It affects not only how you function throughout the day, but it impacts your emotions, your relationship with your partner, and your overall wellbeing. I have a newfound respect for how hard it can be to balance everything when you’re running on empty.

It’s these experiences that have made me more compassionate as a sleep consultant. I no longer see parents who are struggling with sleep as simply “needing a routine.” Instead, I see real people who are doing their best, who are exhausted and in need of support—not just in terms of sleep techniques, but in understanding and reassurance.

Lessons in Flexibility:

Motherhood has taught me to be flexible—not just with routines, but with myself. It’s okay if your baby refuses to nap in their cot one day. It’s okay if they only sleep in your arms sometimes. It’s okay if you’re not perfect. I now encourage the families I work with to embrace that flexibility in their sleep routines, knowing that the goal is not perfection, but consistent progress.

The Power of Sleep for Parents:

One of the most powerful things motherhood taught me was the importance of sleep for me as a parent. As a mum, I often put my own needs last—especially when it comes to sleep. But I quickly realised that when I’m well-rested, I’m a better mum, a better partner, and a better sleep consultant. I need that sleep to be at my best, just as much as my daughter does. And you do too.

Conclusion:

Becoming a mum has deepened my understanding of sleep on every level. It’s not just about the theories and strategies; it’s about understanding the real, raw experiences of sleep struggles and using that knowledge to better support the families I work with. If you’re a parent facing sleepless nights, know that you are not alone. You are doing an incredible job, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.

I’ve been there. And as both a mum and a sleep consultant, I’m here to support you through it.

If you need help creating a sleep routine that works for your family, or if you just need someone to talk to, reach out. We’re in this together.

Let’s Chat

If you’d like to learn more or talk through your baby’s sleep and settling challenges, I offer a free, no-obligation call. It’s a chance to share what’s happening and explore how I can support you and your family. Click here to book your free call today!

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